It seems self-care is a popular topic these days, yet anxiety levels in women are higher than ever before. How can it be that we are prioritizing self-care but are still experiencing record levels of burn-out and crippling feelings of overwhelm and anxiety? I believe it comes down to being intentional in how and what we choose to fill our tanks back up with. There are what I call energy givers and energy drainers.

Energy Givers

What is an energy giver? Anything that fills your tank back up. For example: Being in nature, practicing gratitude, journaling, spending quality time with family or friends, deep breathing, physical exercise, prayer and reading your Bible, eating a nutritious meal, getting a good night’s rest, volunteering or doing an act of kindness for someone else. Here are some questions I recommend you start out with asking yourself, “What have I done before that left me feeling fulfilled and gave me a sense of purpose?” What are some things I am interested in? Are there any past hobbies or activities I used to do that I haven’t done in a while? Who is someone whose company I enjoy that I could reach out to? When is the last time I moved my body? What can I do to take better care of my body today? When is the last time I had an actual face to face conversation with someone? These questions can help you analyze what you may be lacking in your life and things you can purposefully spend time doing that actually fill your tank back up.

Energy Drainers

An energy drainer is anything that leaves you feeling more depleted or maybe makes you leave thinking, “Where did the time go? I feel like I got nothing accomplished” or “that felt pointless and unfulfilling.” Some examples of energy drainers are social media scrolling, negative self-talk, having a lack of boundaries, using alcohol and drugs, isolating from loved ones and spending more time alone indoors. I recommend you ask yourself this question, “What or who drains me or leaves me feeling unfulfilled?” Then go back to your list of things that are energy givers and start with just picking one thing from that list you can implement today.

It’s important to state that there will always be things and people that are energy drainers. Sometimes there are good things in our lives that will drain us. (Ahem, my very active energetic child). There are responsibilities that are healthy and good for us, but when you find your tank a little too empty it is important to go back to that list of things that fill you back up. Moms are notorious for struggling with this. I love supporting moms find things that bring them fulfillment and joy apart from their role of being a mom. One of the best things I did for my own mental health after becoming a mom was giving myself 45 minutes three days a week to join a community fitness class. Not only am I moving my body, lowering my cortisol, gaining strength, but I am forming connections and relationships all while doing so. If you are struggling with feeling stressed, anxious, and unfulfilled then I would love to help you get a little bit more of yourself back again.