Counseling for Teens After Divorce

Divorce is one of the most significant changes a family can experience, and probably one of the most painful ones as well. For teen girls, it can feel like their world has been turned upside down. As they navigate adolescence (a time already filled with identity shifts, emotional highs and lows, and peer pressure), adding the painful adjustment of their parent’s separation or divorce can heighten feelings of anxiety, anger, guilt and self-blame, sadness, and loneliness.

Divorce Counseling for Teen Girls: my personal experience

I was 17 years old when my parents got divorced. I was a senior in high school, just about to graduate . It was a time where I should have been feeling extreme excitement for all the possibilities up ahead, but instead my world was turned upside down and I found myself with a broken heart that was masked with a lot of anger and resentment, self-reliance, and crushed self-worth. Divorce affects everyone differently because the circumstances of every divorce are unique. This blog post explores some of the common ways divorce may be impacting your daughter’s mental health.

Teen Mental Health After Divorce

Research indicates that teen girls whose parents have divorced are at an increased risk for various mental health challenges. Studies have found that these adolescents exhibit higher levels of internalizing and externalizing problems after their parents divorce, with effects persisting and increasing over time compared to peers from parents whose marriage remains intact. What this means is that your daughter may appear to be adjusting well on the outside, when in reality she may be internalizing how she feels.

Emotional Impact of Divorce on Teen Girls

A teen girl navigating her parents’ divorce may experience a wide range of emotions: grief and loss (mourning the family unit and the way things used to be), anger and resentment toward one parent or both parents for the divorce, feeling betrayed or abandoned, guilt and self-blame (wondering if she caused the divorce or if she could have prevented it), anxiety and fear about all the change that may come as a result of the divorce or separation, sadness and loneliness (feeling isolated, especially if she feels her friends cannot relate to her), confusion and uncertainty (struggling to understand why the divorce happened and what it means for her future), and she may even be feeling a sense of relief if there was a lot of conflict at home. Sometimes these feelings of relief are met with guilt and normalizing all feelings associated with divorce is an important part of your daughter’s healing.

Why Counseling is Essential for your Teen Daughter

Some of the deeper unseen issues that may come up for your daughter in the years following her parents’ divorce are among some of the most important things to know about and can be something that she can process and heal from with a therapist. Parents, this is what I wish my parents would have known when I was 17 years old. I wish they would have put me in counseling to save me years of hard earned lessons, pain, and unhealthy dating relationships. If there’s one part of this blog I want you to read what comes next: As a result of divorce, your daughter may struggle with low self-esteem (feeling unlovable, unworthy, or questioning her value), experience trust issues (struggling to trust others in relationships, fearing future abandonment), hyper-independence or parentification (taking on adult responsibilities or feeling the need to “fix things” or “fix others”), and fear of relationship failure (developing anxiety or skepticism about love, marriage, or long-term commitment).

This is not to say that every teen whose parents divorce will struggle with these things, but I personally did myself, and I have counseled many teen girls who have also struggled with some of these deeper issues as a result of their parents divorcing. Counseling for your teen daughter in the months or years following divorce can help her process any internalized feelings she may feeling or may not even be aware she is feeling. It can help your teen daughter tell her story of how the divorce has impacted her. I will provide a safe space to express her feelings, frustrations, and fears surrounding the divorce. I will help her process grief and loss, whether it’s the loss of a two-parent home, daily routines that she’s known her whole life until this change, or a sense of stability. I will help teach your teen daughter healthy coping skills to manage any stress, anxiety, or sadness. Counseling for teen girls impacted by divorce can help her identify and rewrite any thoughts or core beliefs she has developed as a result of divorce that may be impacting her ability to have secure, healthy attachments and relationships.

What parents can expect during therapy for their teen daughter

Supporting a teen girl through her parents’ divorce requires a balance of validation, coping skill development, and empowerment. The goal is so much more than to help her adjust to the changes that come with a divorced household, but to equip her with lifelong resilience, secure attachments in future relationships, and a healthy view of self, relationships, and marriage. If your teen daughter has recently been impacted by divorce getting her counseling support is one of the greatest gifts you can give to her and her future self. If you’re concerned about your teen daughter’s emotional well-being after your divorce, don’t hesitate to reach out. I offer compassionate, personalized counseling designed to help teen girls navigate the challenges of divorce. Contact me today for a free consultation.

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