Have you ever wondered why you keep falling into the same struggles over and over again? Whether it’s self-doubt, perfectionism, anxiety, or unhealthy relationships? Or why your teen daughter can’t seem to break free from negative thinking no matter how much encouragement you give her? The answer often comes down to one powerful overlooked factor: core beliefs.

What Are Core Beliefs?

Core beliefs are the deeply ingrained thoughts or beliefs we hold about ourselves, others, and the world we live in. They develop over time, often in childhood and based on our experiences, relationships, and the messages we receive from family, culture, and society. When we face significant events, such as trauma, unexpected loss, or challenging life changes. We then interpret these experiences and form beliefs based on them. For example, after experiencing betrayal, you might come to believe that you’re too much or too difficult to love. These core beliefs shape the way we think, feel, and act. Most of the time we aren’t even aware that we are operating out of these deep rooted beliefs.

Common Core Beliefs Women and Teen Girls are Struggling With

Many women and teen girls unknowingly carry negative core beliefs that shape how they view themselves and their worth. Here are some of the most common ones that women and teen girls are believing about themselves.

• “I’m not enough.” This belief makes women and girls feel like they have to constantly prove themselves. Whether it is through achievements, appearance, or pleasing others. No matter what they do, it never feels like enough. These women often struggle with anxiety, burnout, low motivation, or low self-esteem.
• “I have to be perfect to be loved.” This belief usually got rooted in growing up in a strict, authoritative household. Perhaps you had a critical parent who didn’t allow you to ask questions. This belief can create a fear of failure, abandonment, or deep anxiety around making mistakes.
• “I’m unlovable.” Women and girls who believe this often struggle in relationships, feeling unworthy of love. They may self-sabotage their relationships and push people away. They may struggle with an anxious or avoidant attachment style, or be drawn to relationships or friendships that are unhealthy or toxic.
• “My needs don’t matter.” This core belief often leads to people-pleasing, burnout, and difficulty setting boundaries. These are the women who may find themselves always helping others, working late hours and being taken advantage of, or feeling lonely and overlooked.
• “I’m responsible for everyone’s happiness.” This belief usually got rooted somewhere in childhood. These are the women or girls that may have come from a single parent household or took on a parental role in their family of origin. As a result; they feel pressure to fix, rescue, or keep the peace in their families or relationships.
• “I’ll always be this way.” Many women and teen girls feel stuck in cycles of anxiety, depression, self-doubt because they believe real change isn’t possible for them.

Why Core Beliefs Keep Women and Teen Girls Stuck in Unhealthy Patterns

When you believe something about yourself, your brain constantly looks for evidence to confirm it. For example, if you believe you you are unlovable, you may stay in toxic relationships or friendships believing you don’t deserve better. Or if you believe you aren’t enough, you may dismiss compliments and focus only on the one criticism you may have received. It’s important to know that these beliefs do not just affect thoughts, they shape actions and keep women and girls stuck in cycles of stress, anxiety, and self-sabotage.

How Therapy Helps Rewrite Core Beliefs

Here’s the hopeful part! With the help of a trained therapist, core beliefs can be identified, challenged, and rewritten. Together we will identify the beliefs that are holding you back. The process to do this I believe is really rooted in narrative therapy, which is the retelling of significant stories and experiences in your life that have shaped you. It’s often in these stories that we can uncover and identify where there may be core beliefs that are holding you back from the healing and breakthrough that you are desiring.

After we identify the core beliefs, we will question whether these beliefs are in fact truth. You can ask the question, “Is this belief actually true?”

Then we rewrite the narrative. Instead of, “I have to be perfect,” it becomes, “I am allowed to make mistakes and still be loved.” Instead of, “I’m unlovable,” it becomes, “I am chosen and loved by God.” As core beliefs shift, so do actions. A women who once struggled with boundaries learns to say no. A teen girl who once believed she wasn’t good enough starts to take care of herself instead of pushing herself to unhealthy levels of perfectionism.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Women and Teens in Lake Mary, Florida

If you or your daughter feel stuck, the real issue isn’t just the stress, anxiety, isolation, or low self-esteem. It’s the beliefs underneath them. Until those beliefs are addressed, the cycle continues. When you process your story with a safe person in therapy, you can identify the beliefs that have been keeping you feeling stuck in patterns and cycles you are sick and tired of living out of. When you change the way you see yourself, everything else starts to shift.

If you are a women or a parent of a teen girl struggling with perfectionism, anxiety, self-harm, stress and burnout, feeling lonely and isolated, then Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Narrative Therapy can help you uncover and rewrite the core beliefs that are keeping you from the life you want! My name is Christina Milazzo and I am a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Lake Mary, Florida. I specialize in holistic approach to therapy for women and teen girls in Central Florida. I am a Christian counselor who loves to help women and teen girls live free from the lies they have been believing so that they can embrace the truth of who God says they are. If this is what you desire then I’d love to work with you! I offer free 15 minute phone consultations where we can see if I’d be a good fit for your needs.

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